Random-storykeeper's audio Reviews on Newgrounds

[AIM 2020 - Lavender]

I was drawn in to this composition the moment I started listening to it. I think it really captures the sense of warmth and brightness of the outdoors as evoked in the artwork, and the timbrel palette complements the pixel art palette well. Those lead bells grab my attention, and I enjoy listening to hear how the other layers move in relation to it, particularly the bass. It always feels like the lead and bass are always moving in the same instance, but not at the same time, so there's this strange sense of lagging, even if some notes do line up. Part of me wanted the bass to have more prominence on its own, especially in the moments where the bells were not playing, but I think this also allowed for the warmth of those other pads to break through.

While I love the overall "vibing" sense of the composition, I found a lot of opportunities for developing the sections to be truncated. Very early on, at around the 0:40 mark, the same idea is heard, but at a different key. It seems as though the next iteration after that is also gradually descending in terms of the key that it's in. Having strayed farther from the original key the piece started in, it did seem jarring to jump straight back into it and I felt that it, melodically, broke the sense of smoothness given off by the rest of the composition.

It's interesting because at 1:25, the composition diverges again, and I think the development here is a lot more sound than the first diversion and allowed the transition to the repeat section to be more organic.

In a sense, I do think the 0:40 change could have something added - an additional chord in the progression, maybe. Even an extra layer to the texture could be interesting - something syncopated in the lower-mid end to counterpoint the bass? It all depends on your personal taste, and I'm just spitballing suggestions. I like the idea of having a slight diversion before going into a longer diversion at 1:25; I just wish it were done in a way that would not make the immediate repeat at 0:56 have this unsatisfying sense of "oh, it's just this same section again".

Your ideas here truly bring out brightness and relaxation and just the mood in itself is something I could listen to for quite a while. In these stressful times, I appreciate pieces like these. Great entry.

Troike responds:

Thanks! I really appreciate the depth you went into with this feedback and I'll definitley take it onboard for my future compositions. I'm really happy you enjoyed it!

[AIM 2020 | Lutt - Star Cruiser]

This piece fits into that perfect balance of being music that you'd listen to in order to feel better and music you'd listen to when you feel fantastic. That IV V vi chord progression with the use of minor 7ths (so I hear) really elevates that straddling feeling, especially with how the notes move around this progression.

For me, the intro is what truly shines. Those subtle, filtered, fast-moving notes leading to the melody that really cuts through (especially the delays, because those are fantastic). Everything leading up to when the drums feels like it flows naturally. And then you have those higher, off-beat super thin rising notes that just elevate the texture even further. It also makes it interesting because not everything is so on the nose.

Now, as the piece progresses, I think you generally do maintain that same mood throughout, which is great because the composition lends itself to holding on to that one idea up until the end. Once the lead returns at 1:25, I feel like it overwhelms the rest of the other layers of instruments. I know it's different cycles that gradually come in, but I think that sweet spot would have been to really hear clearly how all these layers that I've previously heard culminate. Maybe I'm just hearing things, but I do hear a bit of an arp that's slightly echoed and I wish it was not as subdued.

At 1:47, when the drums leave and there's a really punctuated bass, I wish there was more of a velocity on the bass so that the notes don't always feel like they hit the same. Perhaps a crescendo would alleviate some of the uniformity that suddenly arises given how sparse the notes are in this section. That nasally wave coming in towards the end with that same melody when the percussion is back was a really great touch, though.

I've yet to listen to all the entries in AIM, but this is among my favourites thus far. I did go back to replay it frequently because I genuinely wanted to. I think it's very well crafted and captures the essence of what I also feel from looking at the art used as inspiration. Great work.

Siberg responds:

Hey, thanks for taking the time out of your day to comment a long intelligent response with constructive criticism. I agree with most of what you said too.

Around 1:25, I could've polished up the mix a bit to make breathing room for every element but I just got lazy in the end and worked on other stuff instead lol. The quietest part of the track is actually the arp from the very start of the song, which was originally a chord progression instead but I ended up getting rid of it due to vst/cpu issues. I'm assuming that's the subdued arp you were referring to.
If you want some insight on what's going on in that section, there's bass, drums, a new synth and 3 seperate arps. the intro arp i just spoke of, a modulated square arp which can be heard best around 3:35 and the main white-noisy arp from 0:21, all playing together for the first time in the track so I can see why it comes off as overwhelming.

For 1:47, I didn't do anything to the bass except turn off the sidechain for that section. Any modulation or automation would've gave it more life throughout the track, I'm sure. A slightly longer attack time so it isn't so punchy would be my first change personally. Could've used a different bass entirely to be honest. Nothing is set in stone when making music ...well, until you render and upload it. lmao

I appreciate the support. I'm happy you liked it enough to comment and replay it. <3

[AIM 2020 Wake Up Call]

I find it interesting that the two most prominent elements in this song are birds and alarm clocks, given that the inspiration was a picture of what I presume to be cold coffee. While there are actual bird and alarm clock samples in the song, there are also imitations of said sounds, with that repeating synth at the beginning having the punchy characteristics of an alarm clock and your use of autotune is supposed to be the imitation of a birdsong. Whether or not these elements actually work, I'll mention in a bit, but I at least appreciate that there's thought put into it.

The chorus is quite good and the true reason why I replay this song as much as I did. I think this is where the autotune works best sound-wise, since you sing over this rising synth line, and I enjoy this "duet" of the voice and lead instrument. I also like how punchy the beat feels throughout the entire piece - it really sets the feeling of a standard alarm clock going off while not being so on the nose.

The thing I wish this song focused on more was its sense of progression and development. Despite the minimal introduction, it seemed as though the texture and sound design allowed more to be added as the song progressed. It was disappointing to hear the song just go from this chorus that grooves pretty hard to an identical intro from the beginning - I almost thought the song was looping, and I don't really think that works in the song's favour. Repeats of sections we've heard before are great, but even in sectional songs, the repeat is not always so closely identical with what you've heard before, because, well, it's been heard before. I don't think the intro is strong enough to be a straight-up repeat, rather, something that builds upon previously heard material. It could be something like changing the instruments that play in that repeat, or adding an extra beat/instruments to accompany it. Just something to get that sense of progression and development. If the idea was that you were resetting in the middle of the song, I don't know if that really makes the alarm clock blaring/sudden awakening at the end all that effective of a conclusion.

I think the autotune was very hit and miss for me. It works well with the chorus, since it has to sing against a synth, but the rest of the song, ie. the verses, does not really have a prominent synth line to compete against, so it just seems a little strange. Yes, I read the description - I know it's an artistic license and it's meant to imitate birds. I just don't know if it really makes sense in terms of the song. Like is the idea that you're supposed to be a bird? But then, why do birds drink coffee? Ultimately, when the accompaniment is a little more laid back, it does become a distraction, albeit I do find it more amusing than I do annoying.

Overall, there are a lot of good elements that make the song enjoyable - while I found the birds questionable, I do like how they are integrated into the accompaniment of the song rather than just being a bookend. It feels like a strange intersection of things, even though those elements make up the act of waking up/the morning itself.

SoulSecure responds:

The elements of the song just reflect my inspiration, so not getting it 100% is understandable as we each have our own context to our interpretations of art.

It's not about me being a bird (with the autotune) so much as incorporating sounds I associate with waking up and getting ready and having coffee. I don't know about you, but we (my family) tend to imitate animals to 'talk' to them, like mooing at cows or cooing at mourning doves and singing to songbirds etc. For me it's not that odd to be trying to sound like a bird lol. Saying 'hello' to those starling chicks in my barn as I sip a coffee by going 'Cheeeeeep~ cheeeep~' and getting in my car is just my experience.

I appreciate the comments about the dropout near the end of the song. My wife had suggested adding sound effects for clarity of that part like groaning or something or the sound of a coffee pot dripping would have gone well there, but the fact is I felt went nicely there cuz I thought the repeat of the melody from the opening was a cool segue to the next part of the song. I like your idea of changing it up, but I'm not sure I'd actually do it. Eh, I'll probably save that advice for a future song, IDK we'll see, I might have a random strike of genius along those lines for this, we'll see! :P

[[•] AIM - Digital Blackout]

I like the mood and the overall sense of progression. What's with the click at the beginning of the track? :P

I'm very curious: what orchestral elements did you use, exactly? I thought you meant orchestral instruments, but I didn't really hear a lot of that.

The trance vibe works well for the most part. I think the choice of chords and instrumentation fits the mood I get from the artwork and the progression is fine.

I notice that in the few instances where there seems to be a melody, like at 1:04, for example, it feels like it should be using the pentatonic scale, but there's very clearly moments where non-pentatonic notes are present. Perhaps it wasn't your intention to use the pentatonic scale, but to me, the non-pentatonic notes felt really out of place in the melody that otherwise would have fit to the mood and soundscape comfortably.

Honestly, I felt like it could have used a bit more bass. Personally, the instrumentation felt too light and thin. But that's just me. Overall, I think you took the right approach for this theme and I thought the structure was great, as well as the melody (for the most part). Good entry!

EldritchAutopsy responds:

Thanx for the review!
-----------------------------------
-The clicking at the start I actually have no idea where it came from, in the FL file it doesnt play that but somehow that ended up in the export. I wanted to fix it but the deadline was just around the corner so I didnt have time to get it out otherwise risk editing past when the entry was due.

-For the orchestral elements, theres stuff like sitars, violas, violins, cellos, basses and pianos about in the track, but I used them more to boost elements of the electronic instruments instead such as using the violins to add bass or the pianos following the lead synths to make a chorus of sounds.

-For the notes in the melodies, I never really thought of using any kind of scale, as I haven't really studied up on them enough, but knowing had I done that it could've fit better Im definitely gonna look into that and study up on it properly

Just again, thanks for taking the time to listen and review my track, I appreciate all the feedback and it really helps!

[The Same Room (A Billion Trillion Stars)]

I really enjoyed this piece a lot. The guitars have a wonderful laid back vibe and I really appreciate the subtle panning and how well the instruments complement each other. I love the flow of the different sections and the reversed parts were so weird, but worked really well. The piece almost sounds like it's dissociating towards the end, but just trying to keep things together musically.

So this was you playing guitar? No wonder it sounds so good. I think the only thing I didn't like was the ending. This piece just sort of ends abruptly, and it felt like that wasn't intentional at all. At first, I was wondering if this was meant to be a loop, but given the percussion lead-in, that appears to not be the case. Maybe if the percussion in the first few seconds wasn't there, it would feel like a loop and I would have been all for that.

I dunno, even though the percussion is a big send-off, I love the mood so much that I would dare to say it's one of my favourites from this compo thus far. It's the ideal piece I would listen to while cooped up inside my room. And I think that fits the art just perfectly.

[AIM - SuperNova]

This piece has the right amount of energy, not too much to be overly aggressive about it, but there's also this sense of tranquil beauty that seems perfectly evocative of an outer space scene. I can just feel the heat resonating off this sound design and there's a big "above and beyond" atmosphere that I really like.

The part that I wasn't so hot about (no pun intended - okay maybe pun intended :P) was around the beginning section. At the 1:30 mark, I felt like keeping that bass was almost too protruding, but I do see that it leads into the 1:56 section really well. Perhaps if they were a bit more in the background.

I actually think the piece gets so much better as it goes along. Like the section at 2:21 where everything gets quieter and starts rising up. The arps are lovely here, and the counterpoint with that off-beat instrument that almost sounds like it has vocal qualities works so well, especially when the rest of the accompaniment starts kicking back in.

Despite not really being into the first...quarter of the piece(?), I truly enjoyed the rest of it, and overall felt it captured just the right amount of energy necessary for this instance you were trying to convey.

Teckmo-X responds:

Thank you for reviewing my piece Random!

My music always has some sort of space theme to it, like a feeling similar to it. I honestly didn't know where I was going with this piece but it came out nice. The part at 1:30 is a bit off but I did experiment with other options but my problem was that without some sort of bass it would have felt blend and I was thinking of having some strings or some subtle sounds in the background but that also didn't feel right.

I have been experimenting with other sounds as well and new ways to make music. I do know that there's a long road ahead of me and so I understand there's a lot of things that can be improved.

Thanks again!

[AIM - It Approaches...]

The beginning of this piece is so uncomfortable to listen to - and I mean that in the most positive way possible. I think it really speaks to the subtlety of the creepiness in the artwork. Overall, I like the composition a lot - the slow, foreboding dissonance slots is a good approach to the "impending doom" that's written all over this track.

If I had to nitpick one thing that truly bothers me, I think the creepiness kind of gets subdued by some of the MIDI sounding instruments. Like the piano chords at 2:11 feel like they could have had so much more weight to them if they sounded more acoustic and less MIDI. By the time we get to the 4 minute mark, the soundscape feels like it's just missing a lot of that raw power it had from the beginning.

But I do really like the low bassline when it does that little pitch slide and doesn't quite make it up to the pitch it's sliding up to in tune. I guess not having a lot of instruments did help to bring that out. I enjoyed listening to this, even if it does make me feel like something is coming to get me. :P

Peepers responds:

Thanks for the review!

The beginning was definitely supposed to be grating. Glad it worked.

[AIM - Gestalt]

I think the idea you start off with is very good. It's got this nice, almost slightly sad undertone to it and I like the idea of using that really machine-like harsh sounding synth to evoke the mech aspect. I really enjoyed the sudden addition of the piano at the end, and wish that part had come earlier so I could have gotten more into it.

What I miss from this track is the dynamic range. Everything sounds uniform in terms of loudness and very two-dimensional. I think the repetitive composition itself could be fine on its own if there was more depth to the production so that I would feel more immersed in this environment. If the sound and the way it's produced is interesting, it'll be worth repeating those same ideas throughout, regardless of whether there is a "melody" or not.

The track doesn't seem that aggressive for the art it was inspired by and the description, but I think the overall continuum is quite fun and I'm glad you had fun making the music that you want to make. That's the most important part of all.

As a side note: I love the subtle introduction of the lower ends at 1:35. I think if you made more of those subtle changes throughout, it can change the soundscape in very interesting ways.

TheFantasticZ responds:

Thanks for the feedback!

I'm looking forward to future AIMS.

[Pain Drain]

I was off put by this entry at first because on first listen, it feels like it's all over the place. The sound design kept me intrigued enough to appreciate the composition the more I listened to it.

The vibrant soundscape complements the brightly coloured palette of the art. The middle section of the piece feels like it's wandering all over the place, but I find that's what I like about it. Like capturing different aspects of a city during the day. I like the weird use of the augmented second around the 3 minute mark; it provides such a stark contrast to the more joyous sounding melody heard in the first half of the piece.

There was only one big issue I had with the piece. I don't think the key change that occurs at 4:40 clicks with me very well. It might be that the melody didn't quite sound like it was taking the key change into account while the rest of the accompaniment was, so it felt super jarring, especially given that it came right at the end. I also found the key change was unnecessary; bringing back that melody from the beginning and maybe repeating it a second time probably would have sufficed. At that point, it just kind of felt like the music was trying to go somewhere else last minute instead of bringing things down to a conclusive and "satisfying" end.

But overall, I think I like this piece the more I listen to it. There's just so much weird stuff going on surrounding the music that I can pick out and focus on different aspects of the music the more I listen to it. Great entry.

[AIM - Journey Beyond]

I think the way this piece is structured really speaks to the journey you mention in your description. I like the idea of having an emotional beginning and ending, and having this idea tie in with the strings that convey the rocket taking off. It was all set up in a way that I could hear what you were going for in the way you connected your ideas to the artwork.

The biggest issue I have with the piece is that while I feel like the structure is very good, I'm not really sold on the composition itself evoking that sense of longing, journeys and wondrous discovery. To me, I felt like I wasn't quite getting the full emotional appeal from the main musical idea that is repeated throughout. And that's not to say that you can't have a repeating idea for the entire three minutes - I just think that when doing that, the emphasis on the journey should be conveyed through the layers in the texture. I can hear you adding some layers, especially to the part with the strings towards the end, but it seems like there isn't enough momentum and "excitement" leading up to the final section.

I really wish the fast moving strings were more present at 2:24 - it might be the balancing, but at 2:36, they sound like off-beat eighth notes and it feels as though the piece is fizzling out before it actually ends. Because you have the more slow, quiet section at the end, I think keeping those fast moving strings constant up until the bells kick in would have built up more contrast between these two sections and made the final section, with the same ideas, have a bigger impact.

Another thing I wanted to mention is that I feel like the reverse cymbal was not necessary for the transitions in this piece. It's a great way to transition between sections and build up a piece, but it's also such a significant and distinct way of transitioning that when used multiple times, it starts to lose its meaning. There's many ways of moving through sections besides just the reverse cymbal, such as swelling a rolled snare or bringing out that leading tone more. Maybe even slowly bringing in a new layer like those fast moving strings a bar before, starting very soft and building to the normal dynamic you use for the main part of its phrase. Keeping the reverse cymbal as a transition idea rather than THE transition idea will make it feel a lot less like it's just there just because.

I have to say, I truly appreciate the playing around with tempo and thought it was really cool when the part with the bells sped up at the beginning and slowed down. And the part at 1:02 with the oboe? That was a fantastic choice for adding emotional richness to the soundscape overall.

If the composition were as strong as the setup, this piece would feel like it had so much more to say about the scene and a more clear interpretation of it, musically. Towards the end, I could hear a chord change at 3:08 that I wish was brought out more and was utilized a bit more throughout the piece itself. Maybe even different chords accompanying the repeating melody could have been interesting, too. But you definitely have it in you to do it. :P Overall, good job!